I enjoyed the self-care challenge hosted by Shilpi Mayank-Awasthi in the SpecicalSaathi community.  This challenge was rooted in the idea that parents must attend to themselves if they have to parent a  neurodivergent (ND) child effectively.  This is a very important point.  Parenting an ND child is a marathon and parents need ways to sustain themselves on this journey.

Our self-care practice has taken the form of Reconnect with Happiness.  All of us want to be happy.  But we are pulled in so many directions that we may end being stressed and burned out.

Discovering our Six Ss Approach

Ananth has been learning dance from Sri Ujwal Jagadeesh at the Ramana Maharshi Center for Learning since October 2022.  Our journey with Ujwal has not been a traditional dance class experience.  Rather, it has been a process of discovery.  From the first class, I knew that this was more than a dance class.  But what were we discovering?  After more than 18 months, we have organized our discoveries into the Six Ss. As shown in the picture below, we follow a conscious approach to reconnecting with happiness that includes Six Ss: 1) Smile Brightly and Dance, 2) Soothing chants, 3) Storytelling, 4) Silence, 5) Self-inquiry, and 6) Surrender.  I will write about each of these practices in future posts

Watch the video below on our discovery of the Six Ss.  This presentation was made on April 2, 2024, the World Autism Awareness Day.  By this time, we had discovered all six practices.

https://youtu.be/tfPp6VRoryI?si=qrwvE8fHLeyK-lkW

During the last few years, Ananth had been experiencing much stress.  Hence, our quest was for a proactive approach to stress management.  In the presentation above, we focused on the Six Ss as practices for stress management.  However, later we realized that Reconnect with Happiness is a better way of framing this project. Stress management is a natural result of practicing happiness daily!

About Ramana Maharshi

Our approach is rooted in Ramana teachings. Ramana Maharshi is one among the great spiritual masters of India who has guided the world to get back to their own nature which is divine and blissful. Ramana Maharishi  showered his love on all living beings. He has been guiding seekers of truth to and rejoice in the power within themselves.

Where is Happiness?

Ramana’s teachings highlight the idea that happiness is not in the outside world,  Consider the question:  Are we looking for happiness in the wrong place?

Happiness is within us. It is there whether when we are parenting ND children and experiencing many stresses.  But we must be aware and discover this happiness.

Watch this introduction to Self-Inquiry by Ujwal for an understanding of our approach to reconnecting with happiness.  This excerpt is from our virtual meetup on 26th June 2024. 

https://youtu.be/cG415l_lIc8?si=sCfiS05QbEn3qITX


Reconnect with Happiness Project

Ananth and I attended our second Self-Inquiry workshop at the Ramana Maharshi Center for Learning on June 22 and 23.  Our Reconnect with Happiness project crystallized after this workshop.

A question that I have been asking myself:

Would it have been better to start with a Reconnect to Happiness practice over 20 years ago?

We started with Relationship Development Intervention (RDI).  RDI prepared me to be a better guide to my child.  But should the journey have started with how I should take care of my happiness?

I think I would have benefited by such a project at the very beginning of my journey.  The situation is even worse in some ways today.  There is more information than I had when Ananth was growing up.  However, this information comes with  challenges.  There is a constant stream of information on social media.  I wonder how parents are able to process all this information and parent in a loving and caring way without falling into the “I need to fix it fast” mode.  I encourage all parents to look within and discover the happiness within themselves each day.  A few minutes on such a practice will help parents engage the constant stream of information and activities with greater ease.

Our Journey

Since Ananth attends 2 or 3 classes with Ujwal each week, our practice has naturally emerged from this experience.  Ujwal focuses on Ramananjali nritya, a Bharatanatyam practice that explores Ramana’s life and teachings through dance.  We were also fortunate to visit Tiruvannamalai three times.  On two of these visits, Ujwal was there with us.  His presence on those trips also helped us discover and develop our Reconnect with Happiness practice.

Watch this presentation by Manju Iyer where she explores ND children and spirituality.  Ananth has naturally connected to the Ramana way.  So has Manju’s daughter Lavanya. 
https://youtu.be/ZmuyNJ5nwEY?si=qosS5Ko2Kbc1P75T

We encourage every parent to explore and to discover their own path to happiness.  Will our children lead the way by their natural connection to spirituality as Manju calls it? We will share our journey to give ideas and focus attention on this very important topic of our own happiness.  Our happiness and well-being create a better environment for our child’s learning and development.  We believe that this topic is so important that we have renamed our main Parenting group Reconnect with Happiness.  Join us for daily shares on this topic here:

https://chat.whatsapp.com/G3ugGAtcQOK0sGQg5X8LnP

Author Dr Dasaratha Rama
Dr. Dasaratha Rama is a professor and home educator. She was the editor of a monograph on service-learning published by the American Association of Higher Education. This monograph was a part of a series of monographs on service-learning published by AAHE. She was also an Engaged Scholar with the Campus Compact, an association in the US dedicated to higher education civic and community engagement at colleges and universities. She has served as the Chair of the Teaching and Curriculum Section of the American Accounting Education. She is a certified leader in systems thinking, mapping, and leadership under a program offered by Cabrera Research Lab. She is currently doing a certificate in Theater Arts for Holistic Development (TAHD) from RASA (Ramana Sunritya Aalaya).